Guys, have you seen the commercial that suggests buying your Valentine the new Twilight movie will get you laid?

(It aired during the Knicks game. In between Lin's 38 points, 4 rebounds, 7 assists and 2 steals).

Let me tell you something....

It probably won't.

And by probably, I mean it won't.

(Real talk - as much as I loathe jewelry commercials - any woman will tell you, a diamond drops panties quicker than a DVD).

But please, don't you fret.... There's good news to be had.

Romance (is that what we're calling it these days?) is within your reach.

And all it takes is throwing on an apron, breaking out the measuring cups and surrendering your manhood for two-point-five seconds.

If the effort alone doesn't charm the ever-loving pants (figuratively speaking, of course) off your sweetheart, may Cupid's arrow strike me down.

------------------------------------------

Recipes, take it away....

The original heart-shaped Rice Krispie Treats. Plus a few drops of red food coloring.

Chocolate chip peanut butter cookies from How Sweet Eats. With a bag of festive M&Ms thrown in for good measure.

Heart-shaped shortbread cookies from Martha Stewart. Dipped in dark chocolate... and sprinkles.